I got nothing. I mean, I'm watching the movie, and I've got basically nothing to say. Things are happening. Amanda Seyfried and GaGa Bernal are on their pre-wedding honeymoon in Italy. They're trying all sorts of food and wine, but she'd rather be humping. And they're just about to start arguing about it.
And I've got nothing to say. It's not doing anything for me, negative or positive. It's just happening. I haven't really seen anything in their characters to make me like or dislike them. Hey, he cooks. Wow, she writes. Big fucking deal.
"Hi! Blah blah blah!"

"I know, right? Blah blah blah!"

I guess I should make something up. OMG, the sweeping landscapes are stunning! I'm all wrapped up in their story! Such acting! Or maybe take the other side of the coin. Holy crap, this sucks! Who made this turd! I can't even hear what they're saying!
But the fact is, that for the first ten minutes of this movie, the movie just is. In fact, I'm making a new star rating just for this movie. And that star rating is: NO OPINION.
I wouldn't normally watch the rest of this, but I think we're gonna head upstairs and finish it in bed. So I'll watch for a bit while Jess falls asleep. (She's had a few glasses of cider, so this is pretty much a foregone conclusion.)
The best thing about Letters to Juliet was the trailer for the upcoming move Red. It looks pretty sweet!
I watched about ten more minutes after Jess fell asleep. I will say that I kinda liked the premise behind the actual letters to Juliet in the movie, but the movie itself didn't get much more interesting. I'm done with it.
MAN!!! What is it lately with movies about privileged women who are not happy with their amazing life situations? GAWDDDDDD!!!!
In the first ten minutes, we find out that Amanda Seyfried is not happy with her job as a fact checker at The New Yorker magazine, and she wants to be a writer. Well, she is maybe 12 years old, so I have no sympathy. That shit takes time. Not everyone can be like Doogie Howser.
Then we're suppose to believe that Gael Garcia Bernal is some kind of jerk, because he takes her to all of these great wineries and cheese farms in Verona, Italy and -- gasp! -- it's a business trip! Oooohhh nooooo, so sad! So hard to be dragged around eating cheese and wine... I hate them.
I will continue to watch this film because it is set in Italy and anything set in either Italy or NYC gets an instant 1.5 stars from me. And, well, it's a chick flick. And it's got old people no less. That means at least one more additional star and ensures that I am going to cry for a quarter of it (i.e. Up, Awakenigs, The Notebook. I know, I'm embarrassed for me too). So for those reasons alone, 2.5 stars. I need a vacation.
(Bri: Didn't take long. Didn't think it would.)
(BK: My guess is Jess will watch the rest of this flick sometime in the future, but it could be a while. If she does, we'll update the follow-up.)