LARRY CROWNE
FIRST 10 MINUTES
I'm not sure what to make of Larry Crowne so far. Is it a serious movie? A comedy? Romance? All of the above? Who knows? It opens with a serious premise: Older, uneducated (almost Gump-like) man gets fired from one of the few jobs he's capable of performing, and one that he loves doing. And on top of it, the guy is way in debt to the bank. Pretty heavy stuff. I mean, this guy is fucked.
Tom Hanks is playing it pretty straight. However, they throw in Cedric the Entertainer and the cop guy from The Hangover, who seem better suited to over-the-top comedies like that. In fact, both of them are acting as if it IS The Hangover. But it's not, and they seem very out of place.
Hanks's role and the movie so far just seem to be beneath him. He wrote and directed it, so I guess he's gotta star in it, but his role seems like it should have been cast down to a lesser actor, say a Patton Oswalt or Kevin James. It makes me feel sorta sad for the guy. Also, I keep expecting him to go into that crap-awful accent that he used for The Terminal, which would somehow heighten my "enjoyment" of this movie.
I interrupt this review to tell you that this movie sucks. I'm never doing favors again.
I didn't exactly have high expectations for the movie. I mean, movie trailers can make even the worst piece of crap look like the best movie on the planet. But the trailer for this one was just blah. It didn't show anything that even mildly piqued my interest or made me want to see it, which is tough to do. Looks like I'm finding out why.
I'm assuming that we're not gonna watch the rest of this one. It will probably fly out of the PS3, cuz I'm pretty sure Jess is as appalled by it as I am. If we do watch it, it will be more out of a morbid curiosity. How bad will it get?
FOLLOW-UP
Well, we kept watching, and I'm kinda glad we did. This is terrible! There's not a single believable character. There's not a single believable situation or scene. Why is Julia Roberts in this? Why is anyone in this? Why is everyone in the scooter gang snapping like the Sharks (or the Jets?) from West Side Story? Wow. I still haven't figured out if Tom Hanks's character is supposed to be mentally challenged or not. I seriously don't know.
FIRST 10 MINUTES
The opening sequence probably pisses off Target/Walmart/Best Buy/Bed, Bath & Beyond/Linens & Things/Fred Meyer/Kmart employees everywhere. No employee of any of those establishments ever looks like they are having as much fun as Tom Hanks seems to be having. Well, maybe when they quit, I bet that part is fun. But other than that, they make working at "UMart" look like it's Christmas everyday. It makes me instantly hate this movie. I hate Christmas. No, just kidding, and I'm Jewish! Not kidding.
Oh, MAN! It just got worse!!!!! This plot is bullshit. There is NO WAY that Target/Walmart/Best Buy/Bed, Bath & Beyond/Linens & Things/Fred Meyer/Kmart employees are fired because they don't have a college education. This is a plot point! Sorry for the first-ten-minutes spoiler, but Tom Hanks is fired from a job he has had for nine years or something because they failed to notice that he didn't have a college education. I'm sorry, but the last time I checked, I'm pretty sure you didn't need any education to work at Walmart, you don't even need to have clothes on. Come on, is Tom Hanks THIS far removed from society? We need to make a movie about celebrities making movies to investigate.
Oh no, enter Cedric the Entertainer as the "quirky neighbor," and that's the first ten minutes. I have a feeling I will hate the other ninety or whatever minutes.
Okay, let's see, here is my prediction of how things will go. He goes back to school and figures out that he actually hates work and loves school. And he just goes to school forever and ever and takes his 200k debt up to 2 million dollars or more. He has a child with Julia Roberts, eventually splits town and leaves her with his schooling bill, or I don't know, he turns into Forrest Gump.
JESS SLEEP METER
Bri: Wow. I'm shocked Jess stayed awake for this one. Hell, I'm shocked that I stayed awake. Actually, I'm mostly just shocked that we kept watching this one.
FOLLOW-UP
I feel so ashamed, I actually watched the entire movie. No Sleep Meter here. I think it was so bad I had to see if it got better. It didn't.