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| FIRST 10 MINUTES |
| I don't know. I just don't know. I was a little kid when the first Clash of the Titans was released in 1981, and I loved it. I was always a big fan of Ray Harryhausen and his incredible (back then) stop-motion effects. So I was looking forward to seeing what they'd do with the remake. So far, I just kinda long for Harryhausen's cheesy ghetto special effects. |
| In the first ten minutes of this remake, there are a few semi-big effects moments. First, a huge statue of Zeus is destroyed by soldiers, who cause it to tumble dramatically off a cliff and into the ocean. It wants to look spectacular, and by all rights should look spectacular, given what filmmakers do with special effects these days. But it just looks like okay computer graphics. Harryhausen's models may be way outdated and cheesy, but at least they looked tangible, unlike bad computer graphics. |
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Can you tell the 1981 Kraken from the 2010 version? Look close. |
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| The second effects piece involves a bunch of demon-like creatures that swoop out of the ocean and into the air, carrying off and/or killing the soldiers that destroyed the statue. And I guess they look okay, certainly better than the old days' effects would look. But they aren't very interesting and we've seen it all before in other crappy movies like Van Helsing. |
| The third is when the demons all join together to morph into Ralph Fiennes. Looks pretty good, but when he sends a fireball into a ship, the resulting explosion just reeks of more computer graphics, the quality of which rivals something you'd have seen on the the Sci-Fi Channel (now SYFY) several years ago. |
| I'm curious to see if the Avatar guy can carry the picture. He hasn't done much so far, but we'll see. He seems like a Russell Crowe in the making (is that a good thing?), or maybe he's just a Russell Crowe wanna-be, that remains to be seen. |
| I'll keep watching to see how this movie goes, but I'm not very hopeful at this point. I have a feeling there's gonna be a lot of fast-forwarding to get to the special effects parts. |
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| FOLLOW-UP |
| Yeah, pretty much as expected. Not much to rave about. Some of the effects scenes were fun to watch, but that's about it. |
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| FIRST 10 MINUTES |
| The first few moments of the film are spent setting up the mythology so we modern viewers can follow along. I am usually the person that falls asleep during The Odyssey or anything having to do with history, especially mythology. I mean, it's mythology, it's not real, it's like if I wrote a novel about my characters that I created in SIMS 3 and it became the word of the world in a million years. Well, it's a little different. |
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"WOLVERINES!!!" Oh crap, wrong movie... |
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| How is it that I have never paid attention to The Kraken though? All of the other Greek gods have epic names: Zeus, Hades, Poseidon. But "The Kraken"? Does anyone else think this is weird? Maybe after those gods got all the cool names, a different author took over the mythology and just could not come up with an epic name. Let's think of some substitutes for "The Kraken." Please feel free to comment some better names as well. How about "Mannificent," "Trom," "Vortimeulz," "Sorkapateez"? I mean, that took me literally ten seconds! Wow... "The Kraken"?? |
| Anyhow, this movie sucks. It is a suckfest like all of these other suckfest films with musical crescendos, sweeping camera moves over the ocean, people looking longingly to the left while repeating the last word of sentences for emphasis. The special effects are bad too! In these kinds of movies, I can still pay attention if the effects are spectacular, but these are really bad. I mean, I get that 3D modeling a mythological movie is difficult, but if you can't get it right, then don't make the movie. |
| Do Christian people like this movie? Greek gods are sacrilegious, right? Just a thought. |
| Another random thought: Did Avatar Guy just come out of nowhere? I've never seen him before Avatar and now he's in all these blockbuster hits, and he seems not very blockbuster to me. He must be blowing somebody. |
| Not going to watch the rest of this, but I am going to investigate the Christian and blowing stuff. |
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| JESS SLEEP METER |
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| (Bri: And she's outta here!) |
| FOLLOW-UP |
| Never. |
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